Value-Based Parenting: The Secret to Raising Grounded Kids in a Noisy World

The recent appearance of Kaun Banega Crorepati child contestant has left many parents and viewers unsettled. His arrogance, impatience, and sense of entitlement sparked a flood of online debates. While some dismissed him as “just a child,” others condemned him harshly.

Here’s the truth: He is indeed a child. A real boy, with real feelings, navigating the world shaped by his parents, teachers, peers, and the society around him. Yes, he and his parents must take responsibility for what played out on screen. But as a society, we too cannot escape accountability. Somewhere along the way, we have collectively allowed entitlement, arrogance, and brattishness to become normalized.

The question, then, is: What can we do differently?

The answer lies in value-based parenting—a conscious, intentional way of raising children that emphasizes principles over privileges, effort over entitlement, and humility over arrogance.

In today’s fast-changing world, parents often find themselves grappling with challenges that didn’t seem as pressing a generation ago. Entitlement, temper tantrums, bribe culture, meltdowns, and what we jokingly call the “six pocket syndrome” (where grandparents and parents all indulge a child’s every wish) have become increasingly common.

We see children struggle with arrogance, impatience, and an inability to handle failure or criticism. And while parents shoulder much of the responsibility, the truth is that society at large also contributes. When we normalize shortcuts, excuse arrogance, or reward entitlement, we cannot expect our children to grow up immune to these patterns.

The solution lies in returning to value-based parenting—raising children on principles rather than privileges, grounding them in gratitude and humility rather than indulgence and entitlement.

Why Entitlement is Growing

Many modern parents face situations like these:

• Entitlement: children expecting toys, treats, or gadgets without effort.

• Bribe culture: offering chocolates or phone time to stop a tantrum.

• Six Pocket Syndrome: multiple caregivers fulfilling every wish, leaving little room for patience or discipline.

• Meltdowns: children struggling when told “no,” or when faced with setbacks.

What seems like minor issues in childhood often grows into larger challenges later—difficulty handling criticism, poor resilience, and strained relationships.

The Heart of Value-Based Parenting

Value-based parenting is not about being harsh or authoritarian. It’s about offering children the values and skills that help them thrive as human beings—responsible, empathetic, and balanced.

Some guiding principles include:

1. Gratitude Over Entitlement

   Encourage children to practice gratitude through small habits—saying thank you, helping with chores, or recognizing what they receive.

2. Boundaries Over Bribes

   Avoid transactional parenting. Replace “If you do this, I’ll give you that” with natural consequences and consistency.

3. Effort Over Outcomes

   Celebrate attempts, not just results. Allow mistakes and failures to become stepping stones for resilience.

4. Empathy Over Arrogance

   Encourage perspective-taking through stories, discussions, and acts of service.

5. Presence Over Pampering

   True love lies in emotional presence and guidance, not material indulgence. Sometimes, saying “no” is as important as saying “I love you.”

   
   

Lessons From Our Roots

India’s cultural fabric is rich with everyday practices that quietly but powerfully shape children’s psychology. What may seem like simple traditions are, in fact, profound tools for building resilience, empathy, respect, and humility.

Take for example the practice of touching elders’ feet. On the surface, it’s a greeting. But for a child, it becomes a daily reminder of respect, humility, and the recognition that wisdom comes with age and experience. It anchors them in a larger value system.

Similarly, sharing family meals creates a sense of belonging and security. In these small moments, children learn gratitude, communication, and the joy of togetherness. Research even shows that children who eat with their families develop stronger emotional regulation.

Listening to grandparents’ stories—whether from the Ramayana, Mahabharata, or folk traditions—exposes children to moral lessons, dilemmas, and the richness of human experience. They learn courage, compassion, and the ability to see beyond themselves.

Helping in the kitchen or with chores instills responsibility. A child who contributes learns that love also means shared effort, not entitlement. This nurtures competence and confidence—both protective against anxiety and fragility.

Practices like daily prayer, gratitude rituals, or reciting the Panchatantra help children develop calm, patience, and reflection. These rituals ground them, offering inner anchors in times of stress or uncertainty.

From a psychological perspective, these simple practices build:

• Resilience (through coping with limits and disappointment)

• Humility (through respect for elders and traditions)

• Empathy (through stories and shared experiences)

• Respect (by valuing people and spaces around them)

• Self-regulation (through discipline and reflective rituals)

They may seem small, but their impact is immense. Parenting doesn’t need to be complicated or outsourced to modern strategies—it only needs to be intentional. By blending modern awareness with timeless Indian values, we can raise children who are not just successful, but also deeply human at heart.

A Wake-Up Call

The solution is not in scapegoating a child or his parents. The solution is in making value-based parenting the norm, not the exception. It is in holding ourselves accountable for the environments we create—at home, in schools, in public discourse.

Every child deserves the chance to grow into a responsible, respectful adult. Every society deserves citizens who are empathetic, grounded, and resilient. And both begin at the same place: the values we pass on to our children.

The KBC incident is not a viral episode to be forgotten next week. It is a mirror held up to our collective faces. Will we look away, or will we use it as a reminder to raise children not just to succeed, but to matter?

A Gentle Reminder

✨ Parenting is not about raising perfect children—it’s about raising good human beings. With intention and with values, we can give them the roots to stay grounded and the wings to truly soar.